Wednesday, 1 March 2017

Life Lately | March 2017

This isn't a planned post. Today I was meant to publish the second part of my make-up declutter post, but I was finding it too difficult to write because I just have far too many products to note - find more info in the original post.

Instead, today I want to talk to you about life lately. It's not often I do 'life update' posts on here, and I don't really know why. Maybe it's because I talk so often on my Twitter about what's going on, where I've been and where I'm going, so I don't feel the need to write about it here too. But there's been a lot going on in my head lately, and you may have noticed I've been a little down in the dumps if you ever pay attention to my Tweets. There's a few life changes happening right now, and most of them are good, but still my head isn't quite in the right place.


First off, let's talk about the blog. Back at the beginning of February I gave my blog a well-needed overhaul. I generally do these on a yearly basis, but I'm pretty happy with how it looks at the moment. Elements of it haven't quite settled - I feel like my sidebar isn't quite on point, and I'd like to really work on a logo - although I'm finally happy with my title font. I have an idea in my head for my logo, and I can draw up most of it - but when it comes to the digital side, I'll need a little help, and at the moment I'm not sure who to ask. I'm excited for when it gets finalised though, as I love the idea of it and I can't wait to finally have a real logo - and maybe get some business cards done ;)!

I've also upped my photography game - or so I'd like to think. My flat lays have taken a completely different direction and I'm feeling mega inspired to do blog photography. I'm struggling a bit with perfecting the white background, but there's only so much you can do on free software, I feel. However I'm happy with my photos at the moment nonetheless.

On a few final blogging notes, you'll have noticed a change in my schedule. Working full time night shift didn't allow me the time to be creative - I went into a slump because all I ever did was sleep. I didn't want to spend my free time doing what felt like a chore, and I knew something had to change. I stopped trying to post on my blog as much - four times a week made me feel like I was plugging gaps in my schedule with mediocre content, rather than producing my best content just a few times a week - and I revamped my blog look. I now post Wednesdays and Saturdays at 6pm, and you can expect to find a lot more variety in my content. For the first time ever I even plan on sharing some books I love with you - something I never thought I'd write about here in my little corner of the internet! I might even start talking about gaming - who knows? There are some topics I know I probably won't talk about - I'm still too shy/afraid to ever talk about sex in its own post, and personally, I don't enjoy talking about politics, and I find it difficult to discuss food and travel because I just don't have the writing skill to really talk about it, but even expanding the topics under my 'lifestyle' header by just a few is a nice feeling, and it's a little more freeing.

Looking at my blog schedules has me very excited, and that's something I haven't felt in the last couple of months. It's funny because I know I'm not the only one who had a rough time with blogging at the beginning of the year, and there seems to be a bit of 'blogging blues' going on lately, which sucks. Several of my favourite blogs are producing less and less content whilst struggling with motivation, and I wish that wasn't the way. For me, when I started seeing blogging as a hard chore rather than fun and excitement, I knew it was time to step away and refuel before trying again.


Another thing you may have seen me mention on Twitter in the last few weeks is that I handed a letter into HR to discuss the possibility of me dropping two out of my five days a week. I really wanted to keep working full-time - for the money and for the fact that it made me more of an 'adult'. It seems silly but I get a lot of judgement for having never been a student since I spent my sixth year of high school at Edinburgh College, yet I've only ever worked part-time. It's not that I particularly care about people's judgements, it's just one of those things that bugs me because people just assume that I'm lazy or spoiled or that I couldn't possibly need the money. 

I was right in sticking to part-time for so long, given the abysmal state of my mental health over the last few years - leaving the Yankee Store was concrete proof that I had to take work in my own time. And, again, I feel I made the better move in requesting a drop in my shifts. There's a number of reasons for this - firstly is the lack of free time I had. I worked Tuesday nights through to Saturday nights, meaning I finished at 6:45 on Sunday morning. I'd go home, get about five hours of sleep, then go out into town or to Costa just to keep myself awake. On bad days, I'd continue to spend the rest of my Sunday in bed with movies. Monday was my only free day where I wasn't tired or dreading work at night. It's not the job I dreaded - just how fast my free time went. Working so much meant I never saw my friends, passing up evenings out at the cinema for sleep, and the more I slept, the worse I felt - like depression all over again. I barely ever had the motivation to blog. I wasn't eating right - most of what I was eating was junk food. I wasn't reading any more. I never really made an effort to wear my beaut new clothes and play with my new eyeshadow palettes. And, of course, the biggest part was that I missed Jack - with him being day shift and cafe manager, trying to work around each other's schedules was next to impossible. 

I've also been looking forward to the summer, and want to have more free time in the warmer months, as well as be able to go out playing Pokémon Go with Jack again as we spent so much time together doing this last year! I miss him so much through my working week and it feels like we're in completely different time zones, when in reality he lives a ten minute drive from me. I'm looking forward to us getting back on track as not getting to spend time together on dates or just watching TV cuddled up in bed breaks my heart. I'm looking forward to having more time for 'us' again and I hope that it makes me feel like we're back on track because right now it just sucks not being able to see him.

So, what's next? Surprise surprise, I'm looking at college again. Nothing's set in stone, but at the moment I am looking at trying out the Introduction to Counselling course, and then move onto the HNC if I enjoy it. After that, I can't say for sure. There is a diploma for counselling, but the course for it doesn't seem to be offered at EC. My other option from there is to go into mental health nursing at university - mental health as a career choice does appeal to me, but going to university doesn't, so I'm not sure what will happen then. Originally, I was looking at doing makeup artistry in college, and while makeup is a big passion of mine, in recent months I've realised it's just not what I want for a career. It's not that makeup is frivolous, I do love it, but I feel like I want to do something that's a little more impactful - and I hate saying that because I love makeup, and it does have an impact. But I'm more drawn, at this point, in trying out something mental health related, especially after all that I've been through.

As I type this, I don't have confirmation of my two days a week being dropped, but fingers crossed the HR people at work get back to me and are willing to make it happen ASAP. 


I want to end this dreary post on a more postive note, so here are a couple of things that have made me happy in recent weeks! I'm still loving making orders from ELB Handmade, and although I'm trying to curb my addiction to the beautifully crafted items, I really can't help myself - especially as they are regularly updating their Tictail store with restocked items or brand new lines. It's very exciting! The newest lot to my collection are the Belle Bodysuit and the Sateen Set, and in the photo above is the bra from the Mesh Insert High Waist Set

You may be aware that last month I got tattooed by the amazingly talented Rizza from the Bath St Tattoo Collective in Glasgow. I sat for just short of four hours, and whilst it was pretty uncomfortable - it seems I don't sit well for more than about three hours at most - and there was so much line work and shading that my skin was painfully raw at the end, it was definitely worth it. I couldn't have asked for my Ankylosaurus to be any more perfect, or executed by anyone else other than Rizza: she hit the nail on the head and was a pleasure to meet. It's nice to know that I have one tattoo artist hero ticked off the list now! I don't really like to post my tatts clearly online as it makes me a little nervous it'll be stolen, but I do want to share them at the same time, so here - say hello to my new dino bud at the end of this post.

I had a week off in February from work which worked out as me having nine days off. It was blissful. I was hoping to spend most of it with Jack, but he didn't get the time off so I hung out at his for a bit whilst he was at work and we got a couple of days together which was lovely, and we played Resident Evil 7 which is pretty rad so far. 

I'm also aware that it's March now, which means in a couple of weeks I'll be jetting off to Amsterdam which is mega exciting! And speaking of travel, I can't wait also to get back and look into booking Cyprus with Jack. Give me ALL the heat, sun and pool side chillin'.

So that's my life lately. As I mentioned at the start, I have a lot of exciting things coming up that I can't wait for, but it's also a very difficult time with my mental health. I'm hoping with spring beginning that I'll start to feel a bit better and get out more, and also regain some motivation for life. Well, that and my drop in hours will kick in soon - fingers crossed. My first step to getting my shit together? Putting together my blog header/logo.

How has life been treating all of you?


Privacy Policy
© Amanda Jayne. Design by FCD.